Return to Paradise

Posted on by goldenlifemusings

I fell in love with Aruba the first time I visited and vowed that I would return. And just like that, 17 years passed before I would visit this beautiful island again. Of course, a lot of things have changed in nearly two decades, but at least one thing has remained the same – the vibe. Out of all the places I’ve visited, this is still one of the few that makes me feel most at home.

Mom fully enjoying the Aruba experience

One of the things I love most about Aruba is the climate. It’s absolutely perfect. It is considered a Caribbean island, though being further South, it exists outside of the tropical storm region. That makes it ideal for travelers all year long because there is no hurricane season. Also, it stays hot, but the tradewinds make the heat bearable. Like I said, perfect.

I didn’t know it at the time, but when my family and I visited in 2004, it was the last family vacation we would take before my father passed away. That made our return to the island for my mom’s birthday bittersweet. While we remembered the warm memories, we reveled in the opportunity to create new ones. 

We chose the Divi Aruba Phoenix Beach Resort, one of the three Divi Resorts properties in Aruba. One of the considerations for our selection was that we wanted to have accommodations that would allow my mom, brother, and I to have our own bedrooms (and bathrooms), while also having the opportunity to come together in a communal space. The three-bedroom penthouse suite was just what we desired. (Though it was a two-level suite, so going up and down the narrow, winding staircase took some getting used to.)

This resort differs from the other two Divi properties in that it is their timeshare property. While we did not have the ability to partake in the all-inclusive plans that the Divi Dutch Village Beach and the Village Golf & Beach offer, our suites had a full kitchen and multiple bedroom suite options that the other properties don’t offer. All three properties share amenities such as restaurants, spa, and pools, so it really comes down to what your priorities are for your accommodations. 

Our view of the beautiful property and greenish-blue waters from the dining room balcony.

Here are some other notable things to share about the property:

  • There are two restaurants on the property, which are both amazing – Pure Ocean and Pure Beach Bar & Restaurant. Both are right on the water, so you have fantastic views to complement the delectable delights. Definitely dine at Pure Ocean for an early dinner at least one night. You will have a front-row seat to the most glorious sunsets. What I loved about both restaurants was the service and the variety of dishes for different palates and diets. The resort also has a deli for quick bites on the go and an ice cream shop for those with a sweet tooth. 
  • While the spa is small, it is quite lovely and the service is excellent. I was not expecting the foot-bath in rose petals while we awaited our massage therapists. They also give you the option of indoor or outdoor treatments.
  • One of the things that I didn’t enjoy so much is having to get out early to grab beach chairs. The eager early risers get out as early as 6:30 am to grab (and save) the chairs closest to the ocean. By noon, most of the chairs are gone. So if you’re not an early riser, it’s best to wait until the late afternoon to get a beach chair or lounge by the pool.

I’ll end by sharing recommendations and things to know before traveling to Aruba.

  • One of the reasons my family loved Aruba so much was because of our experience at a restaurant called Cuba’s Cookin’. I know what you’re thinking…a Cuban restaurant in Aruba? Yes, to this day, this restaurant has the best Cuban food I’ve had in my life, including my dining experiences in Cuba. We loved it so much we went twice our first time there and vowed to visit again when we returned to Aruba. And it wasn’t just the food, it was the live music as well. It’s a whole experience. When you go, definitely get the empanadas, camarones al ajillo if you’re a seafood lover, and the bistec palomilla if you’re a beef eater. You’re welcome.
  • Aruba is known for its beautiful white and pink sand beaches and nearly clear, greenish-blue waters. Baby Beach is ideal for snorkeling, as the tropical fish are abundant there and the water is shallow. It is a 45-minute ride from the main strip of hotels in Oranjestad, so make arrangements to visit in advance. On this visit, we opted for a beach closer to our hotel, Eagle Beach. It has been rated one of the best beaches in the world. Just be sure to bring your beach towels from your resort and cash to rent a beach hut and chairs. (They take US dollars.)
  • Because of its dry climate, aloe is a staple in Aruba. Aloe has many health benefits, including having antioxidant and antibacterial properties, which make it useful for sunburn and dry skin. Definitely pick some up while you’re there.
  • Aruba is serious about its covid policies. Be sure to visit aruba.com before your visit and follow all of the guidelines closely. Most importantly, you must complete an Aruba ED-Card (Embarkation-Disembarkation Card) prior to your arrival. It is a mandatory step for every visitor including kids and babies. Also, make sure that you make your covid test appointment upon your arrival because slots fill up fast and they require you to have your results back at least a day before your departure. While Aruba has worked to simplify the entry requirements, any of the headaches you experience is worth your entry to paradise.

For more golden life musings, visit www.goldenlifeventures.com.

Time for Wine

Posted on by goldenlifemusings

After several weeks of fall travel, I figured it was time to sit my behind down and get to musing. In September, mom and I decided to take a road trip down US-29 to one of our favorite places – Charlottesville, VA. This charming, college town, is not just home to my alma mater, the illustrious University of Virginia, it is home to more than 40 wineries within 25 miles driving distance. And fall happens to be one of the most beautiful times of year for this road trip.

I should mention that as I’ve gotten older, I’ve developed a bit of an affinity for wine. This coupled with the realization that I had not visited one winery in the area in the two decades since my matriculation, meant that it was well beyond time.

Jefferson Vineyards

Our first stop was Jefferson Vineyards, which was about a 15-minute drive outside of Charlottesville. This small but lovely vineyard offered two seasonal flight options that each included four varieties. (Note: If you’re not familiar with the lingo, the term flight is used by wine tasters to describe a selection of wines.) I opted for the white and mom opted for the white and red combo, which came with a rose. They also gave the option to purchase cheese, charcuterie, and chocolate snacks to accompany your wine selection. Out of all the wines I tasted, including some of mom’s reds, I enjoyed the 4 Gold Medals Viognier the best. Never mind that it was the most expensive (insert sigh here), but my taste for wine is somewhere right in the middle – not too sweet and not too dry. 

What mom and I loved most about this particular vineyard though was the scenery. The little flower gardens that included seating perfect for social distancing had an undeniable calming effect. They also offered abundant seating on an expansive field that included a large tent and umbrellas for larger parties and smaller tables and chairs that overlooked the rolling green hills.

Merrie Mill Farm & Vineyard

Our next stop led us to the Merrie Mill Farm & Vineyard in Keswick, which was another 15 minutes or so down the road. This one had me at the long, rolling driveway lined with grapevines. Though still charming, this vineyard was much larger than the first, and included a sit-down restaurant on the property. The outdoor restaurant seating offered a beautiful view of the vineyard we saw on our drive in and seeing the sun begin to set beyond the hills was another great treat.

The taste offerings at Merrie Mill were much more generous than the first winery. Additionally, they only provided one flight option to purchase that included a combination of red, white, and rose varieties. This tasting was enough for two people unless you’re a heavyweight in the wine department. Merrie Mill also offered heavy snacks that included charcuterie and cheese platters, as well as salads. My favorite wine here was the rose, of which I purchased a bottle to take home. It was crisp, refreshing, and had just the right amount of fruitiness without being sweet. 

Overall I enjoyed the vibes, views, and vino of both wineries and I would recommend them both. I’ll be heading back to Charlottesville soon and will keep you updated on more wineries to try.

Here are some other tidbits to consider:

  • As our time only permitted us to travel for a couple of days during the week, we were limited to the wineries that were open on Wednesday. Note, most wineries are open Thursday – Sunday. 
  • If you’re familiar with Golden Life Musings, you know I’m not fond of dining at restaurants I have back home. This trip led us to a few new great finds for dining. If you love burgers, check out Burger Bach in the Shops at Stonefield shopping center right off of 29. I enjoyed the lamb burger, featured in the pic below, and mom ordered the traditional cheeseburger. Both were delicious.

We also thoroughly enjoyed Sedona Taphouse, which served arguably the best stuffed shrimp I’ve had.

On our way back up the road, we wanted something quick, hot, and delicious and Angelic’s Kitchen did not disappoint. Both the fried fish and fried chicken were delicious. The mac n’ cheese wasn’t the best I’ve had, but the greens (not pictured) were on point. And I’d be remiss not to mention that this one was black-owned. 

  • While you’re in town, take some time to stroll down the quaint, downtown Charlottesville area. This is me and mom’s favorite part about Charlottesville. They have some really cool small businesses and local street vendors that could use our support, especially in these times. Ten Thousand Villages, where I actually bought a couple of Christmas gifts, is a unique store with a phenomenal cause behind it. There are actually more than 50 of these stores around the US that sell fair-trade items from dozens of disadvantaged artisan groups in 30 different countries around the world.

Making Lemonade

Posted on by goldenlifemusings

I had it all planned out. Upon my return, I knew one of my glowing Golden Life Musings reviews would follow. After all, I carefully researched, selected, and booked this beautiful 5-star luxury resort. It was the perfect destination for my dear friend’s bachelorette weekend. We all needed this celebratory getaway and break from reality, if only for a few days.

I posted Instagram and Facebook stories documenting our journey, starting with the private car to the airport. The arrival and check-in at the resort were first class. Being preferred club guests, we were whisked away to a private check-in experience where we enjoyed champagne and light fare while the staff prepared us for our stay. 

I did the usual video tour of my beautiful ocean and pool view suite that I planned to post later. My first priority was changing into my swimsuit and meeting the ladies at the beach. The bath-like beach water, the warm sun setting on our backs, the laughs and connection with friends, some of whom we hadn’t seen since before the pandemic…everything was perfect. We enjoyed a lovely dinner at the steakhouse followed by a restful night’s sleep. A leisurely morning gave way to a delightful seaside breakfast.

I will forever cherish this moment I got to spend with my friends.

Then the reality of the times broke our stride, as we prepared to take our covid-19 tests for our return trip home. As we sat masked up in the cold, uninviting conference room space turned testing site, my dear friend and roommate and I chatted about the craziness that the last year and a half brought while we awaited our release back to our vacation with our negative rapid results. 

Even though I knew logically it was possible, nothing could prepare me for the fact that one of us would not have a negative result. Instead of handing us our paperwork and letting us walk out the door as we saw the dozen or so ahead of us do, a staff person greeted us and asked us to follow her around the corner. I immediately knew something was wrong. She sat us down, handed my roommate the paperwork indicating her results were negative, then she handed me my results and said those awful words, “Your results came back POSITIVE.”  

The moments beyond that were a bit of a blur, but immediately a litany of thoughts rushed my brain. “How is this possible?” “I don’t feel sick at all.” “But, I’m vaccinated.” “How can I take another test to prove this one wrong?” “Why is this happening?”

Within an hour, I took a PCR test, which is more conclusive. Within another hour I was being escorted to another suite on the opposite side of the property. From that moment on I was left alone with my thoughts and the sinking feeling that I might actually be sick. Adding insult to injury, I soon realized that I would miss moments I could never get back. The results from the PCR test would not arrive until late the next evening, the night before our return home. Everything that I carefully researched, planned, and paid for, I would miss.

As a single, extroverted woman, the isolation brought on by the lockdown was already enough. Now, here I was trapped in a room (to which I had no key), by myself in a foreign country until the results of my PCR came back. Feeling like a leper, the hotel staff delivered me room service through a private box in my closet. None of this was helpful to my mental health state. On multiple occasions, I mumbled, “This is just too much, Lord.”

I tried to shift my perspective by thinking about the fact that there were worse places to be quarantined. After all, I was staying in a five-star luxury resort swim-out suite with access to unlimited food and beverages, cable TV, and wi-fi. One of my friends I talked to back home, a mother of two under five years old, countered, “I would love to be quarantined by myself for a couple of days.” It’s all about perspective, right? 

A timed selfie I took from my swim-out suite I captioned “Making Lemonade”

The following evening around 9:30 pm I received the results that I prayed for and ultimately I knew to be true – NEGATIVE. A glimmer of hope pulsed through my body, as I just knew that I would get to experience the last night with my friends and enjoy the property. Then another disappointing blow. It didn’t matter that I had the negative PCR results that would allow me to catch my flight home the next day. The hotel policy was that I still could not leave my room until I checked out. You can imagine at that point the thoughts that followed. “Really?” “Why Lord?” “Get me out of here.”

I may not ever know why this happened. And the truth is, the “why” doesn’t always make us feel better when terrible, unexpected situations arise. “What can I learn from this?” is always a more productive and empowering question. I asked myself this question and I thought the answers would encourage you as much as they have encouraged me.

You will have more peace when you focus ONLY on the things you can control. I had very little control over the circumstances that took place. Such is life. The more I focused on them, the more frustrated, angry, and disappointed I became. Once I realized what I did have control over – my behavior, my thoughts, and my attitude – I felt more at peace. Choosing joy changes everything.

Gratitude always helps. When I felt myself slipping into a sad, sorry for myself space, I went to my Father’s word. I landed on 1 Thessalonians 5:18. Be thankful in all circumstances. I realized that I had a lot to be thankful for, at that moment and when I returned. That PCR test and subsequent tests upon my return home proved that the first test was a false positive and I never actually had covid. I thank God that I didn’t and that I made it home safely. And if the PCR test had come back positive and I had to stay in that resort for the required 10 days, I would still have had many things for which I could be grateful.

Nothing lasts forever. This is something I’ve been learning my whole life. While the wait for my PCR results was the longest 36 hours of my life, it did not last forever. Clearly, the wonderful moments I had on the resort with my friends as a free woman did not last forever either. That’s why when we do find ourselves in those beautiful moments that life gives us we should not waste them. Cherish each of them, for as long as you can. And when you do find yourself with some lemons…well, go grab some water and sugar. 

In My Feelings

Posted on by goldenlifemusings

Have you ever had a string of wild, unexplainable things that happen to you or around you that have you thinking what planet am I on? How did I get here? Yeah, me too. I think it happens to us all at some point in our lives. Because we all have different backgrounds, experiences, personalities, and perspectives, these moments can affect us very differently. For some of us, these seasons can cause our mental and emotional states to go into a tizzy.

I like to identify this state by using the vernacular of today’s times, being “in my feelings.” I don’t know about you, but when I’m in my feelings, it’s tough to distinguish reality from what this heightened emotional state is telling me. 

Our feelings are very real to us but what they tell us about ourselves, about others, and about life overall is not the truth. Since I was very recently “in my feelings” and decided to minister to myself to find my way out of them, I figured I wouldn’t be selfish and keep my enlightenment to myself. 

One of the most helpful strategies that I have employed to get out of my feelings and back into reality is reminding myself of God’s promises. If you’re anything like me, you’ve wondered if there was a guidebook to adulting that would help you get through life more successfully. I want you to know not only does this book exist, but we also have access to it. That book is the Bible, and it’s filled with God’s wonderful promises that cancel out the lies our feelings try to get over on us. 

Whenever you find yourself in your feelings – perhaps you are there right now – read over and meditate on these promises below. They may not be groundbreaking in the sense that they change the world’s problems, but they may be a start to finding peace with and perhaps solving your own.

God’s way is perfect. All the Lord’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.

Psalm 18:30

All is and will be well.

Tell the godly that all will be well for them. They will enjoy the rich reward they have earned! Isaiah 3:10

His plans are still intact and what’s mine is mine.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11

God will sustain me and rescue me.

Even to your old age and gray hairs, I am he. I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you. Isaiah 46:4

I am His, and God delights in me.

For the LORD your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs. Zephaniah 3:17

He gives me rest.

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Matthew 11:28-29

God guides me and gives me counsel.

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you. Psalm 32:8

God is my refuge, strength, and help in my time of need.

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1 

I always have access to God’s peace.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27

God will never forsake or forget about me. 

The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8

God’s perfect love casts out all fear. 

Such love has no fear because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. 1 John 4:18

Nothing can separate me from you. 

No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:39

I am blessed because I believe.

But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. Jeremiah 17:7

Blessed is she who believed the Lord would fulfill his promises to her. Luke 1:45

    Our Spiritual Password

    Posted on by goldenlifemusings

    Candidly, April was a rough month for me both personally and professionally. Not only did a bunch of commitments converge, it was a month filled with disappointments, setbacks, and unexpected challenges. Have you ever just had a whole season where you felt like everything was coming at you at once? Yeah, it was one of those moments. For the first time in the five years since I launched Golden Life Musings, I didn’t write. I needed a minute y’all.

    While I attempted to recenter myself, I came upon a devotional that put things back into perspective for me. The message was around spiritual warfare and it identified one of the weapons we can use when we find ourselves in the middle of an attack. When I say attack, I don’t mean a physical attack or even an anxiety attack. Spiritual warfare is an attack on the spirit. It’s not just an attack on any spirit; it’s a spirit that belongs to the Lord. And the enemy’s strategy is to attack a spirit when it’s at its lowest, weakest moment. 

    The good news is we have a spiritual password that can unlock the key to our joy and abundant living. Yes, even while undergoing trials. It is more powerful than any other weapon known to man, particularly when you’re dealing with spiritual warfare. That is the “Name of Jesus.”

    If I’m about to lose you, hold on a minute. Let me explain. 

    At that time you won’t need to ask me for anything. The truth is, you can go directly to the Father and ask Him, and he will grant your request because you use my name. You haven’t done this before. Ask, using my name, and you will receive, and you will have abundant joy.

    John 16:23, 24

    What John is saying in this scripture is that there is power in the name of Jesus. When Jesus died on that cross and was resurrected, things changed for us as believers. Previously we had to approach God through people (priests); but with this incredibly selfless, sacrificial act of love, He gave us a direct connection to our creator. He not only erased all of our sins, He made us acceptable to God. He gave us access. 

    Just think about all the miraculous things the name of Jesus has done throughout the Bible. We are saved by that name (God has given no other name under heaven by which we must be saved. Acts 4:12). We are baptized into His name (…be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Then you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. Acts 2:38). Regular ordinary people like the disciples were able to cast out demons with that name (These miraculous signs will accompany those who believe: they will cast out demons in my name…Mark 16:17). That name is the truth!

    And here’s another thing that will really blow your mind. That same power and spirit that raised Jesus from the dead also lives in you, by way of the Holy Spirit.

    The Spirit of God, who raised Jesus from the dead, lives in you. And just as God raised Christ Jesus from the dead, he will give life to your mortal bodies by this same Spirit living within you.

    Romans 8:11

    So when you are feeling hopeless, helpless, lost, powerless, or any of those feelings that don’t serve you, know these two things. You have the authority to go directly to our Father and use our spiritual password to gain immediate assistance. You also have the ability to activate that power and spirit that lives inside of you to access your joy and abundant living He promised you.

    I’m not saying you won’t ever have trials or unexpected challenges, or that you won’t be affected by them. What I am offering is a tool to use when the heaviness of those trials threatens your overall joy and peace. I want you to know that no matter what comes your way, you have a spiritual password you can use, that when coupled with belief, can move mountains. Particularly the ones we’ve created in our own minds. 

    My Review of Marco Island, Florida

    Posted on by goldenlifemusings

    As a travel professional and enthusiast, one of the unexpected but welcomed outcomes of the global lockdown has been the opportunity to explore new domestic travel options. With Florida boasting some of the best beaches in the United States by far, I’ve made it my go-to vacation spot during the pandemic. 

    I’d heard great things about the southwest coast of the Sunshine State so I decided to make it the destination for my birthday trip in February. I’m so glad that I did. Depending on what type of traveler you are, Marco Island, which is a beautiful barrier island 20 miles south of Naples, you may have one of two completely different reactions to it. Let me first share with you some potential drawbacks before I discuss everything I loved.

    Real Talk

    Marco Island, and really the entire southwest region, is not particularly racially diverse as far as residents or travelers. Think the opposite of the Miami region, which is about a 2.5-hour drive away. For an indication of what I mean, I looked at the last census numbers and the racial makeup of the city was 95.9% white.

    This beautiful year-round beach and boating resort island is also extremely laid back. That means if you’re a beach bum like me, a nature lover, or a golf fanatic, you’ll really enjoy yourself. Those are the primary attractions this resort town has to offer. If you are an adventure freak or someone who needs a mix of turnup with their beach vacay, you’ll be extremely disappointed. But, if you are a couple who’s looking for a romantic, quiet getaway or a family with young children, this vacay spot is for you. And if you are a bachelor/bachelorette group or a family looking to entertain your teenage children, it’s best to look at some other options.

    Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, let me share with you everything I loved about Marco Island and the beautiful boutique resort I patronized, The Marco Beach Ocean Resort.

    The accommodations

    My favorite part about this quaint, oceanfront resort is that it offered spacious suites with breathtaking sunset views for a reasonable price. Contrasting the Cheeca Lodge Resort in the Keys I blogged about last month with gorgeous sunrise views, this resort gave a front-row seat to the most beautiful sunsets I’ve seen. 

    The one-bedroom suite also offered a full kitchenette complete with a refrigerator, microwave, stove, and oven. This is perfect for reheating leftovers or cooking your own budget-friendly meals. 

    I also loved that this boutique resort was serious about its covid safety procedures. All staff wore masks and properly socially distanced. The resort also had signage requesting that all guests wore masks in public areas and numerous hand sanitizing stations.

    The beach

    This barrier island on the Gulf Coast side of Florida offers six miles of blue-ish, green waters and powdery, white sand that is filled with beautiful seashells close to the shoreline. This is a great thing if you like to collect seashells. The drawback of this beautiful scenery is that this shoreline can do serious damage to your feet! I recommend sea shoes. Be careful! 

    Most of the resorts, like the Marco Beach Ocean Resort, offer beach-side service and plenty of comfy beach chairs and umbrellas. However, when the hotel is at capacity, you will want to get down to the beach as early as possible, if you’d like to reserve prime seating. 

    The water was a bit chilly in February, but during the late spring, summer, and fall months, the water is ideal for water wading. I should also mention that the weather in February was perfect – sunny and warm with low humidity. 

    The food

    If you’ve been reading my blog for some time, you know I couldn’t talk about a destination without reviewing the culinary delights. If this is your first time reading Golden Life Musings, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Leslie, and I’m a foodie.

    Whenever I visit a new place, I try to visit as many of the restaurants at that destination as possible. Let me first say that I did not have a bad meal in Marco Island. At least three of my meals were at the resort, and they were all spectacular. The highlight of my experience, however, was at the Italian restaurant Sale e Pepe, which offered a special pre-fixe 5-course meal for my birthday dinner. (FYI, this also happened to be Valentine’s Day). It was a whole FIVE STARS!

    Here are some of my other personal recommendations:

    • The yellowtail snapper with a lemon, garlic butter sauce and szechuan green beans at Marco Prime Steak & Seafood Restaurant
    • Crab legs (or blue crabs if they have them), Pinchers claws and crab rangoon at Pinchers
    • Kale salad and parmesan truffle french fries at The Beachfront Bar & Grill at the Marco Beach Ocean Resort

    Needless to say, I thoroughly enjoyed my time on Marco Island. Candidly, I was looking for a quiet vacay where the goal was to relax at the beach all day, enjoy delicious culinary treats and spend quality time with my mom and significant other while taking in the beautiful, serene environment around me. If that’s your jam, Marco Island’s got you covered.

    A Day with My Multi-Millionaire Mentor

    Posted on by goldenlifemusings

    Have you ever had one of those rare moments when you don’t fully realize the true significance of a moment until the moment has passed? I had one of them recently when I had an opportunity to sit down and chat with a man who I’ve admired in business since I found out who he was about six months ago. He’s excelled in pretty much every industry he’s touched from music to network marketing. He’ll be the first to tell you himself that he didn’t excel in those arenas because he was an extraordinary person. He worked very hard for his success. However, what is truly extraordinary about him is his thirst for and commitment to the growth and transformation of something that we all possess and have the ability to change at any moment.

    Before I share some of the insights and nuggets from my conversation with a person of wealth, let me help create some perspective for you by sharing a contrasting story. About a week prior to this vision-stretching session with my new mentor, I met a woman at an event where I was presenting some information about my business. At the conclusion of my talk, the woman shared what she described as a bad experience with a similar business because it required more work than she realized in order to have success. It required hard work. I thought to myself, the business she’s referring to was one that I actually made a decent amount of money with and helped to put me on track to becoming a full-time entrepreneur. We had two totally different experiences with the same business. That got me thinking further…but I didn’t connect the dots fully until later.

    That day with my new multi-millionaire mentor, whose name is Edwin Haynes, I learned that he had very humble beginnings, including a learning disability that made him read slower than normal. That means that it required him to work harder to read, which of course at the time he hated. Today, not only is he an avid reader, he’s an author. Clearly, the hard work paid off right? But I believe it wasn’t just his work ethic that got him to where he is. All the books that I’ve read over the last fifteen years like Think and Grow Rich, Secrets of the Millionaire Mind and The Top 10 Distinctions Between Millionaires and the Middle Class all point to one critical determining factor to our success – mindset.

    Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right.

    Have you ever wondered why or how two people who grew up in the same circumstances, sometimes even the same households, go on to lead opposite lives of wealth and poverty? Is it really because one was more capable of attaining wealth than the other?

    Mr. Haynes talked about his struggle with overcoming what he calls programming, or conditioning. His programming, like many of ours, told him to do the things the people around him were doing. But then he realized that there was a whole world of success outside of the box he grew up in and it required him to do something different to get out of it. It was uncomfortable and it required him to stretch himself beyond what he believed was possible for himself. But he persevered anyway.

    “Stretch yourself. Do the uncomfortable until it’s not uncomfortable, and then stretch yourself again. That’s the key to success.””

    What really became clear to me that day was that success is a choice. Living your most abundant life possible is simply a decision you make. Living a life of greatness is not about whether or not someone is capable, because I believe God put that ability in all of us. Many of us just suffer from a belief deficit and quite frankly, stinking thinking. The good news is, we have the ability to change our belief and our mindset at any time.

    I mentioned before what I thought was extraordinary about Mr. Haynes is his thirst for and commitment to the growth and transformation of something that we all possess and have the ability to change at any moment. That is mindset. He’s constantly elevating himself to new levels because he continues to invest time, money and energy into his own personal growth and development, which begins and ends with the proper mindset.

    My day with Mr. Haynes was my way of investing in my own personal growth and development. It cost me time, money and energy. But was it worth it? Absolutely! The nuggets I learned from that conversation elevated my mindset, which in turn has motivated me to increase my work ethic, contributing to increased results. They’re all connected.

    Here are some of the biggest takeaways from our conversation that I hope will inspire you in some way as well.

    1. It costs more to be broke than it does to be rich/wealthy. If you’ve ever been severely challenged financially you know this to be true with the consequences of late fees, bad credit, etc. Mr. Haynes wasn’t just talking about being broke financially though. What about being broke from a time standpoint or worse, being broke from a purpose or passion standpoint? What does it cost you to not be operating in your purpose? Is it worth working hard to be able to live and walk abundantly in your purpose?
    2. The mind doesn’t know the difference between the truth and a lie. Tell yourself what you want to believe. Our minds are one of the most powerful computers on the planet. And just like a computer, it has programming that we have the power to rewrite. Instead of feeding it with what is, feed it with what you desire. If you don’t believe in subconscious mind power or the power of suggestion, just read any of the books I mention above and see for yourself.
    3. Success principles always work, just like the law of gravity. We cannot escape the laws of success any more than we can escape the laws of gravity. Commit to studying these principles and then execute them in your life to test it out. What do you have to lose? Or better question, how much do you stand to gain?

     

    Me and Edwin Haynes

    Single and Saved

    Posted on by goldenlifemusings

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    This past week I completed a five-day prayer challenge called “Pray for Your Future Spouse Challenge.” In the challenge-crazed day in which we live, it was refreshing to participate in an activity like this that actually had meaning and purpose to it. As a result, it was hands down the most spirit-rousing, meaningful challenge I’ve ever completed.

    Literally, more than 200,000 people from around the world participated in this challenge, which was hosted by a dynamic couple named Jamal and Natasha Miller. Their ministry, which began nearly seven years ago when they became husband and wife, is teaching others how to do relationships God’s way in an effort to help reduce the divorce rate. What a noble mission!

    Here’s why it was so powerful for me. I had ALMOST given up hope that there was a man of God out there for me. I told myself that dating in general in this day in age is hard enough as it is, but then here I am waiting for a Godly man. An emotionally, physically and spiritually mature man. Yeah that’s pretty much like waiting for a unicorn to show up at my front door.

    But then this challenge happened…

    I joined a Facebook community of people (which is as of this writing at more than 241,000 members) ranging in age from 18 to 68 who are all desiring, waiting on and praying for the same thing – a Godly spouse. And yes, there are thousands of single and saved men in this group. All desiring transformation in themselves and their relationships, and in serious pursuit of a Godly woman. Total perspective shifter and game changer.

    The reality is, in my opinion, it’s still difficult to be single and saved – but not in the way I once thought. As a single and saved person, there’s a different criterion by which you measure your mate than the rest of the world. You are going against the grain in a very major way, so by default, that’s going to be challenging. But what I got in this community was that I am by no means alone in this struggle. The men are finding it challenging as well. I honestly thought it was mostly women who struggled with this. I was wrong.

    I was talking to a male friend of mine after church this past Sunday and he said almost verbatim what I had uttered maybe a few weeks prior about the lack of available, Godly men our age, except he was talking about women. I literally said, “Are you serious? There are tons of available, Godly women out here.” But that was just it. We each had our own limited perspective blocking us from the truth. The problem isn’t with the number, because we really only need one to be the one. The challenge has been with our environment.

    Once I put myself in an environment where I saw evidence of that which I thought didn’t exist (or at least was very limited), my perspective and ultimately, mindset shifted. And believe me, there were a whole host of other takeaways that I got out of the challenge as well. I won’t give away the content, because it’s just that good, but I will share one of my biggest revelations.

    I had gotten caught up in our #goals-crazed society, specifically #marriagegoals. As an entrepreneur, I’ve got goals for days, but when it comes to me connecting with my husband, that doesn’t really work. There’s a lot of pressure that comes with goals. I’ve been so frustrated in the past because I’ve been trying to operate from my self-constructed timeline of being married and having a family by the age of 40. Let’s be honest here, it wasn’t just my timeline – society says I should have a family by this age as well. But God doesn’t work like that. He doesn’t operate based on my goals or society’s timeline. He has a plan and vision for my life, as He does for every person on this Earth. My job is to be intentional about pursuing my purpose, waiting for Him to reveal to me His vision for my life and letting Him unfold the plan in His time.

    What I’ve come to know is that being Single and Saved is a sacred group. Even though I still have a desire to be a wife, I’ve become more at ease in my singleness because I believe that this season has purpose, just as my season as a wife will as well. If you’re single and saved I want you to be encouraged and know that this time of singleness has purpose for you as well. Embrace it and enjoy the journey of becoming a better you while you wait.

    If you’re interested in learning more about the challenge and/or the couple who hosted the challenge, visit www.prayforyourfuturespouse.com.

     

     

    How Do I Determine God’s Will for My Life?

    Posted on by goldenlifemusings

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    Let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you. Romans 12:2

    Have you ever asked yourself the question, how do I determine God’s will for my life? Have you ever just made so many mistakes or perceived wrong turns that you just had to stop yourself and say “Ok God, I give up. What am I doing wrong here?” I know I have.

    But then, this scripture changed my life.

    I’ve been drawn to God for as long as I can remember. I’d like to call myself a spiritual person. That is, curious about God enough to seek Him out, study Him and have a relationship with Him. But it took me having to go though a little bit of life first before I actually “walked with Him.”

    What does “walking with Him” look like, you might ask. For me, it wasn’t just about going to church and being satisfied with hearing the word presented to me by someone else – even though that was certainly helpful to my spiritual growth. My real walk began when I started to actually have quiet time dedicated to reading the word for myself, talking to God, actually sitting still and listening for Him to speak back to me, and journaling. That’s when I felt a real connection, and things started to shift for me.

    Several years into my walk, I stumbled across this scripture. I had read it before, I’m certain, because I had read the Bible front to back before. But I didn’t really explore it and dissect it and understand it until I really searched for this understanding of God’s will for my life.

    And there it was. Staring me in the face. Slowly but surely over time, as I strengthened my walk with Him, as I started to not just listen to and seek understanding from God, I started to be obedient – I began to change into a new person. I started to think differently, speak differently, walk differently. I started to make wiser decisions. As the scripture states, I was being transformed. In the midst of my transformation, I found access to determining God’s will for my life.

    Now before you look at me sideways for thinking that I am claiming to be some type of prophetess, let me explain to you what I understand is knowing God’s will for one’s life.

    God has given us some pretty clear instructions on how to live in the Bible. However, one big challenge for us is that we often pick and choose what we’d like to be obedient to based off of our limited understanding of a boundary He has set. In other cases, it may be an unwillingness to do or not do something that requires self-control or discipline.

    However, when we start to study the Bible and internalize the words and truly live those words out, we start to operate in a way that constantly asks the question, “what would God want me to do here?” And you know what happens after that? The path starts to become clear. We start to think and walk and talk like Him. With each step that we take towards obedience, the more our minds are renewed, and the clearer the path becomes.

    Now can I see all the way through to the end of my story, or even answer questions like who will I marry or how long do I have here on Earth? No, but that’s not the point of this gift either. The point is, if you want to know how to live and determine what God wants for you, you just need to first believe that He knows the way and will show you, and allow Him to constantly transform you into the person He is shaping you to be. In that renewing of your mind, there you will find His will. There you will find the firm footing of His plans for you.  In following His instructions, He will indeed show you the way forward.

    Learn more about my personal testimony in discovering God’s will for my life in my newest book, God Doesn’t Make Mistakes at www.ourmistakeshisplans.com.

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    Let Me Tell You A Story

    Posted on by goldenlifemusings

    This week I participated in a podcast with my pastor Keith A. Battle and two other talented authors about the process of writing a book. One of the great conclusions of the podcast was that everyone has a story. In fact, we agreed that there is at least one book inside all of us.

    Everyone loves a good story. That’s what I told myself when I sat down to write the first version of my new book God Doesn’t Make Mistakes. It was a fictional story about a dozen or so people who did not know one another but were somehow connected. And then 2015 and 2016 happened. It was quite a season of turmoil and transformation for me, and my journal reflected that. It was upon the review of those journal entries from that season that I realized the story I needed to tell was my own.

    My story was filled with insights around struggling with purpose, being single and sexually abstinent, surviving as a full-time entrepreneur with a fledgling business, anxiety around the future, forgiveness, heartbreak, waiting. Any of these struggles sound familiar?

    Sure, made up stories are entertaining, but there’s nothing like the juiciness and depth of a story that is well…real. You know how people say truth is sometimes stranger than fiction? True story.

    Going back to my book…God spoke. He told me to use and write my story, so I was obedient. In God Doesn’t Make Mistakes, I actually publish ten of my journal entries from that season. Yes, journal entries that I wrote during a period of time that I felt the most lost, vulnerable, hurt, disappointed, and uncertain. Needless to say, it’s pretty transparent. But that’s what makes a good story right?

    Except I don’t just tell a story. I really break down exactly what I was thinking at the time and use biblical principles to frame the lessons I learned. I’ll give you another cliché statement that is still an undeniable fact. Hindsight is always 20/20. The blessing of journal writing is that you get to look back at what you lived through, in your own words, and apply wisdom to it. That’s what I did here. Even though this book reveals things about myself that I never thought I would share publicly, I knew it was too good to keep to myself.

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    Today, I share with you God Doesn’t Make Mistakes: Learning How Our Missteps Fit Into His Perfect Plan. It’s a story about how a time of turmoil and transformation in my life taught me how to trust God. More importantly, it taught me how to trust that His plans are much bigger than my mistakes. What a refreshing and comforting revelation! I pray the comfort and joy that I received as a result of that revelation extends to you as well as you read my book.

    Like any good story it has lots of conflict, plenty of drama and some humor to balance it out. And even though our stories are different, I know there will be plenty of areas where you can relate and share in the “aha moments.”  If nothing else happens, perhaps after hearing my story you’ll have the courage and confidence to tell your story, because I hope you do know that there is one inside of you too.

    To purchase an autographed copy of God Doesn’t Make Mistakes visit www.ourmistakeshisplans.com. If you are an Amazon or Barnes & Noble lover or you’d like to purchase the e-book, it’s available on those platforms as well. I look forward to hearing your experience with it!

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